Monday, October 27, 2008

Five

I just read an entry from The Pioneer Woman where she asked her readers to describe themselves with five adjectives...and these were mine.

Afraid
Alone
Shaking
Depressed
But somehow still hopeful

Except I lied a little bit on the lats one because I didn't want to be a TOTAL downer. I'm sure I'll be hopeful again at some point in the future, though.
I had an appointment with the psychiatrist today, but we got the times mixed up, I guess, and so I was there what *I* thought was on time, but what I was told was 15 minutes late. I was informed that the doctor was "unable to see [me] because she needs the full hour" (or 50 minutes, really.) The receptionist said they weren't booking any appointments now, that the schedule is full until after January.
I walked out of the office, and that's when the shaking started. I got to my car, and tears started running down my face, and I started hyperventilating.
I don't really know why this upset me so much...why I let it? But I feel terrifyingly fragile.

4 comments:

Becca said...

:( I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling so down..

I'll pray for you. He can heal any heart.

*hugs*

ChickenTherapy said...

Aww beautiful dont let it get you down. There is always a better things to come tomorrow :)

Maybe it was time for a new shrink anyways? Everything happens for a reason and all that :D

MWAH

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry sweetheart...I'm sure I would have been just as upset. Sometimes it's the little things that upset us the most, we don't necessarily know why. I have faith that you'll be ok, just talk when you need to talk, I'm always around.

Love you!

zoot said...

You reacted exactly how I would have in the same situation. I've been wanting to find a therapist recently but have been terrified b/c I think that if it didn't go perfectly and if I didn't really connect with the person, it would do more harm than good - you know?

I'm feeling very fragile lately as well. Maybe that will help? Knowing you're not the only one?

Hang in there!
:)