Break Time

Well, it's that time of year again, when I head off to Edmonton for Breakforth. I'm a little nervous, honestly...somehow I'm not feel spiritually prepared. Talking to the others about what they're excited about made me feel a lack - especially since I'm taking a leadership course when I'm not in leadership. I feel pretty silly about that. I was when I registered for the course, of course. (heh, repetition funny) I'm sure I'll manage to get something out of it, regardless. Mike's heard the teacher speak before, and he said he's quite good.
I'm excited for the concerts, too, though it seems a bit shallow to say that. I get to see Newsboys for the third time - that one's a loud concert, so I may need something to stuff in my ears. I also have an opportunity to see Starfield again, but there's another event that conflicts with that one, and since I've seen Starfield three times in the last two years, I'm afraid I'll have to ditch out on them to see Panic Squad - think "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" in a family-friendly sort of way. It's quite a feat, I think, to be funny these days without getting at all risqué. The other concert that I'm anticipating is Casting Crowns. I've fallen in love with this band over the past year or so, since I find the vocals and music solid in skill, inspirational in execution, and the lyrics to be poignant and honest. To wit:

Is there anyone that fails? Is there anyone that falls?
Am I the only one in church today feeling so small?
Cuz I take a look around me; everybody seems so strong.
I know they'll soon discover that I don't belong.
- Stained Glass Masquerade, from the album Lifesong

Here I go again, talking 'bout the rain and mulling over things
That won't live past today, and as I dance around the truth
Time is not his friend, and this might be my last chance
To tell him that You love him - so here I go again
- Here I Go Again, from the album Casting Crowns

She is running a hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction
She is trying but the canyon's ever-widening in the depths of her cold heart
So she sets out on another misadventure just to find
She's another two years older and she's three more steps behind
- Does Anybody Hear Her, also from Lifesong

I love these songs. Somehow I can relate to a real Christianity, and not just a Sunday morning show. (Another of the songs says, "If we are the body, why aren't His arms reaching?")
I think that's what I need to keep in mind this weekend - that it's not important to look good to the people I'm with, or to the seven thousand other people who will be there. It's not even about looking good to Him. Instead, it's about going thirsty, and asking to be filled - going honest and asking for something real. Forget super-spirituality. I'll be me; I'll be authentic, and we'll see what happens.

Note: I'll try to update - potentially with pictures! - every day while I'm there. They may be a bit incoherent, as we tend to run on very little sleep. But check in! Hopefully I'll have been here :-)